From the Mommy Files…

Archive for the ‘Stressed parents’ Category

Hey there! How’s it going?

Yesterday was the last day of school. Like you, I’ve been mired in all the end-of-the-year events, shopping for teacher gifts, etc. Plus, I’ve been working on an exciting new project, which I will share with you soon. I didn’t want you to think I had succumbed to a new malady, so I thought I’d better check in! šŸ˜‰

Boo and Bebs enjoying the beach on California's Central Coast.

Boo and Bebs enjoying the beachĀ on California’s Central Coast.

 

Like you, I like to read blogs. (Thanks for reading this one!) Some posts really resonate with me, and I share them on Facebook or Twitter. I thought it would be fun to share them here with you.

Here are my 3 favorite posts from this past week.

1. Saying These 8 Things To Your Kid Every Day Could Change Their Life

I came across this on Facebook, from The Breast Cancer Site. It really hit home. Recently, I have experienced a mindshift in my parenting. I’d been reciting mantras, reading affirmations, trying to motivate, inspire, uplift myself — and boost my confidence. I realized my kids needed this too. These are some great tips to help your kids feel good about themselves, gain confidence, security, and courage.

2. To Build (or Break) a Child’s Spirit

This one comes from Huffington Post Love Matters, by Rachel Macy Stafford. This post reminds us that what we say and how we say it can have a profound impact on our kids. We do get frustrated. Absolutely. No one likes to be yelled at — not even us. We aren’t bad people. Sometimes we make bad choices, and make mistakes, but that doesn’t make us bad people. We have to find ways to turn these incidents into lessons of what not to do, and how to do better. Even something as simple as spilling milk — I know, even when it’s the 100th time — can get our goat. I’ve realized that we need to be positive and use these as teaching moments. We can make they feel awful, or we can teach them that mistakes happen, and remind them they are loved, and they can do better. Sometimes easier said than done, but we all need the reminder sometimes.

Now something just for fun! šŸ˜‰

3. Bohemian Momsody

This one’s from Scary Mommy. If you don’t subscribe to Scary Mommy, go now and do it! There’s some great stuff there, and some chuckles too. I’m sure we have all felt like this at one time or another. Enjoy!

What are some of your favorite posts this week? What are some of the otherĀ blogs that you follow?

 

Been away for a while dealing with my elderly parents. Iā€™ll update you on their situation another time. So much has happened.

 

Letā€™s shift back to those small beings living in our homeā€¦our kids. šŸ˜‰

 

Bebs is home sick today.

 

Again.

 

On Monday, I heard about this stomach bug that lasted a day, causing vomiting.

I thought, ā€œPhew. Dodged that one!ā€

 

Spoke to soon.

 

We were up allĀ  Tuesday night.sick_clipart

Just when you think youā€™re done changing the bed linens for the nightā€¦

You know what Iā€™m talking about!

Bebs stayed home from school on Wednesday.

 

Uggh!Ā  I had things to do!

 

 

Iā€™ve got a very full schedule, and not including pick up/drop off, I have about 5 hours, 5 days a week without kids to accomplish it.

Iā€™m singing your song, yes?

 

Youā€™re worried, feel awful for your sick child, and you tend to him/her.

 

But what about the other stuff?

 

I began complaining about all the things that wouldnā€™t get done that day.

 

You too?

 

Well,Ā there’s my trip to the gym.

I have health issues, and this helps me keep those in check, not to mention it curbs stress, improves my mood, and gives me a sense of ā€œYeah! I did this just for me!ā€

I also use that time to read.

Scratch that from the list.

 

Then thereā€™s the grocery shopping, and errands.

 

Oh yeah, I was planning to write.

 

And there is, well, that part-time job.

The one that helps me to celebrate my Greek heritage and culture every day; keeps me involved in the community; gets me published regularly; has been responsible for great learning; offered me the opportunity to meet some really great people (including a mentor!); and, well, Iā€™ve garnered some fans along the way, and their praise and encouragement feeds my ego, and eases my writerā€™s doubt. Itā€™s more than a job to me.

 

Then thereā€™s volunteering. These days, we must be involved in our kidsā€™ schools.

We have to know whoā€™s in the schools, what theyā€™re doing, and well, if we want activities for our kids, we have to be there to organize and work them ā€“ you know. We must also be the teachersā€™ partners in our kidsā€™ education.

My girls go to two different schools. And Boo attends Greek school on Saturdays.

Thatā€™s three schools/PTAs requesting my time.

And I serve on a school board.

You know those days when you have to call and cancel out on something because your child is sick, and it just happens to be the day that everyone else is canceling for the same reason? Yes. We feel guilty when that happens.

 

Iā€™m doing a lot of things, but theyā€™re all very important to me and I make the time for them.

Except on days when I have a sick child at home.

 

NOW WHAT?

 

Most of the to-do list doesnā€™t get done, and it makes me stressed, and Iā€™ve lost my sense of accomplishment for the day.

Those little things like checking off parts of your to-do list go a long way.

 

I started to complain, and then I stopped myself.

 

I pulled out the to-do list.Ā  to do list (4)

 

Time to re-work it.

 

What could I accomplish with my child home?

Is there anything on tomorrowā€™s list that I could do at home, and shift some of the other stuff to tomorrow?

 

As my daughter slept, I took the opportunity to write.

 

I made some phone calls, did some work.

 

CHECK. CHECK. CHECK.

 

Then I switched to some household tasks.

– Planned dinners, made the shopping list.

— Cleaned out a cabinet, then started to file some papers.

Those were much lower on the list, but Iā€™m here, canā€™t go out, so might as well.

 

I couldnā€™t get to the store that day, so I had to plan something else for dinner with what we had.

 

No gym.

–Ā Watched what and how much I ate that day.

–Ā  Since I was stuck in the house, I made a few more trips up and down the stairs for good measure.

 

I moved my ā€œoutsideā€ tasks to the next day.

 

When Thursday rolled around, I got up a little earlier.

– I took care of my writerly tasks before the family woke up.

– I took the kids to school, got that workout in right away ā€“ and did a little extra.

– Work

–Ā Volunteered at Booā€™s school

– Attacked those errands that I couldnā€™t do

 

Then it was time for pick up.

 

I actually thought I had caught up from the sick day, and was ready to attack today.

 

GUESS AGAIN!

 

I got up at 5 (These areĀ Golden Hours. I do whatever I want!). Wrote. Answered emails.

 

Then it was time to get ready for school.

 

Boo went to school.

 

Bebs didn’t feel well. Slight fever, lethargic.

 

Staying homeā€¦again.

 

As I began stressing about all the things Iā€™d have to give up today, I stopped.

 

Time to re-work the schedule…again!

 

– Fortunately, I checked several things off the list this am.

– Gym? Nope. Extended workout on Monday.

– Lunch with a friend? Raincheck.

– Grocery shopping? Will have to wait until the evening.

 

That frees up some time.

 

Whatā€™s on tomorrowā€™s list?

 

Oh yes.

Laundry. Cleaning.

Let’s go.

 

Iā€™ll be so happy tomorrow. Then I can just play!

 

As winter approaches, weā€™re all going to have those days when our kids have to stay home from school, and it throws off our day(s).

Try to remember that itā€™s OK to re-work your schedule.

 

This is a great reminder to not put things off, because you donā€™t know what the rest of today ā€“ or tomorrow ā€“ will bring.

 

Itā€™s a reminder to prioritize.

 

Remember that saying, ā€œMan makes plans and God laughs?ā€

 

Itā€™s so true.

 

Life is unpredictable.

 

We have enough stress. Donā€™t add to it.

 

Some ideas:

– Make sure you leave some flexibility in your day.

– Schedule the mostĀ important tasks early in the day so you’re sure to accomplish them.

– Donā€™t put offĀ goingĀ to theĀ gym until tomorrow, because who knows what the day will bring, and why feel awful that you let yourself down?

– Make that trip to the grocery store today, while you can.

– Don’t leave all the errands for one day a week. Do these throughout the week, when time presents itself.

 

Check these off the list!

 

Take a moment to remind yourself that you arenā€™t perfect, you are a mom (or a dad), and life is unpredictable.

 

You know what?

 

Youā€™re a superhero already.

 

Know why?

 

Cause you are MOM. Or DAD.

 

Plain and simple.

 

Give yourself a break.

 

Donā€™t stress.

 

Now, back to my housecleaning.


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BooBoo BeDoux

Bebs LaRoux

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