From the Mommy Files…

Yes, You Have Just Been Peed On…

Posted on: February 5, 2010

 

   

  

What the #$%^?! You’re changing a diaper, and lo and behold, that little bugger just peed on you. Yuck! Well my friends, you have been christened! Moms, (and dads too) you know what I’m talking about. And this little baptism isn’t limited to boys either. Yes, that sweet little girl might very well pee on you too.  

Years ago when my nephew was a baby, I was so diligent; whenever I changed his diaper, to cover him right away with another diaper so he wouldn’t pee on me. Ha! The little stinker got me once when I was putting him in the bathtub! When he was about to be baptized (for real), my sister held him in blanket to keep him warm, since he was naked (we do full immersion baptism in my religion) and he peed on her. Good thing she wore a dark dress with a print. Had she not told me, I never would have known!  

When I had my first daughter, I thought, great a girl. I don’t have to worry about getting peed on. Guess again! I think she was just a few days old and I had her on the changing table, and she was directly facing me. As soon as I took the diaper off, the cold air made her pee, and it came straight out and got me wet. What the heck! She had peed on me. She got me a couple of times after that, too. I won’t take it personally. Don’t worry, I won’t be telling everyone that story on her wedding day. 😉  

Now second daughter came along, and I hadn’t forgotten about the prior incidents. So I was very quick with the diapers. I thought, this little one isn’t going to get me. but she did. Another time, as I took her out of the tub, I took her in my arms and she peed a lot. Well, at least it wasn’t poop! Did she think I needed a shower?  

Don’t think you’re out of the woods when the diapers are gone. Those little stinkers will pee on you when they are potty training too. I remember my younger brother thought he was being funny, and he peed on anyone who was standing nearby, even if we were there to help him wipe, get his pants up and wash his hands. Devil! My older daughter got me one day when she thought she was done. She was just learning to go on the potty and she had told me she was finished. I went to wipe her, and well….Another time she was too preoccupied to go to the potty and waited until the last moment. She came running and I brought her into the bathroom. As I helped her off with her pants, um, well, she didn’t make it on the potty… Rats!  

In the future, be sure to be quick on the diaper change. That will help with that one. But not quite sure how we stop the getting-in-and-out-of-the-bath attacks. Hmmm….Could we invent something to put on the baby so they can’t get us? Do you think they are getting back at us for something? In the case of my little one, I think she was upset that I took her out of the tub. Already she’s seeking revenge! Every time now, I think, will she pee on me? Here’s an idea…maybe I’ll have Daddy be in charge of her baths. Nope. That won’t work. If she pees on him, he may never give her a bath again! As for the potty training jokesters, leave the room and wait until they finish, before you return. Either that or just be ready for a quick jump out of the way. Always be on your guard! You never know when the monster will strike! 😉 Good luck, and hope you stay dry!  

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